Love that Goes Deeper

Today I went to the Central Library downtown, and on the way there and the way back, as I drove through the neighborhood the library's in (not the worst neighborhood in town, but also not the best), I felt my heart constrict with...love. Call me crazy, but I love Memphis. While many people my age have grown up with the "I can't wait to get out of this city" mentality, I've grown up loving Memphis, despite her high crime rates, despite her gang and drug problems, despite her crazy (and sometimes drunk) drivers, despite her heat and humidity in summer, despite her continuing issues with racism...despite everything that caused her to be rated (by residents) in the top bracket of "Most Miserable Cities to Live In," and more. My city is broken. Many would term her "unlovable."

As the years have gone by, I have begun to realize more and more that my love for my hometown isn't really mine. It's not at all characteristic to human nature to love (not just tolerate or occasionally feel sympathy for, but love) someone or someones who have done nothing to earn that love, and especially not someone (or, in this case, a city as a whole) with such a long list (the above one only scratches the surface of Memphis' issues) testifying more to inspiring hate and frustration than fondness. But there is another kind of love--and really, "human love" falls so short of the real thing that it might as well have a different word to describe it--love that is so powerful it reaches out to even the unlovable.
God loved us before we even knew what true love looked like. Before we were capable of loving Him, He sent His only Son to die for us, and demonstrated a love that went beyond our wretchedness and depravity.

When I was little, I remember when I got my first real Bible (well, if you can call it that...it was still pretty dumbed-down in its wording). In the front, it had a section of "About Me" stuff to fill in, things like my name and age, my favorite subject or teacher, etcetera. Under one of these categories, it had a place to list some things about my parents and grandparents. There was a blank line beside each of these for me to write in why I love them. I sat there and thought for a minute, and then I put my pencil tip on the page and wrote, "because he/she loves me," next to every one of them. It's one of those memories that has stuck with me, and years after the fact God brought it up to illustrate a deeper truth: "'For if you love them which love you, what thanks do you have? For sinners do the same'" (Luke 6:32); and "Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us, and sent His Son to be the propitiation [atoning sacrifice] for our sins" (1 John 4:10).

That's the kind of love I have for my city--my King's love. Just as He loved us first and died for us so that we could have eternal life in Him, so that we could be rescued from our sin, I love Memphis, and I want to see her redeemed and set free. I want to see the Truth shine forth in this city, see those captive to sin and addictions (to drugs, alcohol, sex, popularity, or what-have-you) set free, see the empty and desperate filled with the only Love that satisfies...see the Kingdom of God come to Memphis and kick out every stronghold of evil that has planted itself in this city.

 My God is capable of all this, and I know it is no coincidence that He has placed this desire in my heart--for truly it is only Him and not at all me who could come up with such a notion. Therefore, I will not back down; I will not shrink back in fear, for my God is stronger than any that dare oppose Him. God has been (and still is) preparing me to bring me to the place of being willing to spend myself to the utmost for His Kingdom, His praise, His glory, specifically where He has called me: Memphis. I've grown up here: I know the struggles my city is captive to; I know the strongholds that exist; I know the dangers that inevitably await anyone who dares step forward and shine a light in its darkness. I know the brokenness of a generation growing up with hopelessness, seeking desperately to find worth and meaning in anything within its grasp, but not knowing the only True Source of all worth and meaning. His heart yearns for them to know Him, and therefore my heart yearns for them to know Him.

For is not the Lamb worthy to receive the full reward of His sufferings, and the Lord of All the glory that is due His Name?