Wanna Hear a Cool Story?

This is going to be a bit long, but I wanted to give as much of the full story as possible.
Almost a year ago (has it really been that long?), I wrote a blog post about Memphis and the love and calling God has given me for my hometown. For at least five years now, God has been planting and growing desires in my heart regarding Memphis; He's given me a deep, unwavering love for the people of my city and a passionate longing to have them see and know God as He is, to surrender to Him, and to be forever changed by the power of the Gospel. At some point along the way, I started thinking about the inner city, and found myself growing more and more eager to go there and share the Gospel with the people who live there.

You see, when I was growing up, Memphis saw a huge movement (literally) of Christians. The problem was, they were moving out of the neighborhoods where gangs, drugs, and crime were becoming more prevalent, and into safer parts of town. They had good intentions; the main reason I've heard from some of these families was that they moved to protect their kids. That is a very real responsibility of parenthood, and I am not trying to point fingers or make a blanket-judgment on everyone who did this. My family moved too, and I do not and never have held it against my parents. They did what they felt was best, and looking back I believe it actually was the right choice for our family, especially because of the results it has had for my brothers. That being said, I'm not trying to condemn all the Christians in Memphis who now live in the suburbs and other "safe" areas of town. I cannot make some kind of blanket statement that it's wrong--especially when I just said that, for my family at least, it probably was the right choice.

However, this relocation had dramatic and harmful effects on those left behind. As the Christians moved out, these communities were left vulnerable and open to attack, and Satan took full advantage of that. Crime rates skyrocketed; drug use and gang violence became more and more prevalent; rape, murder, break-ins, arrests, and other reports started to become more and more commonplace in our local news stations' nightly reports. Memphis, we abandoned our own turf to this. The government didn't give up (at least not fully) on these parts of town: Money was poured into projects and school problems, and the police presence was upped to fight crime. But those things are not the ultimate answer; they cannot change crime and sin at the root; only the Gospel can. But during this time, nearly everyone who could, left.

Even while I was growing up in the suburbs, a passion for the inner city started growing in my heart. And somewhere along the way, I started praying. It's funny how, so many times, you start praying for God to do something without asking to be any part of it, and over time He changes your heart and you find yourself asking Him to send you. That's exactly what happened. But there was a problem, it seemed: I didn't live anywhere near the inner city, and honestly had hardly ever been close to it. Now what?

So I kept praying and asking God to show me what to do and to open the doors to whatever it was He had in store for me. Ironically, in the fall of 2009, I felt like He was telling me to go to this discipleship program that was just starting up the following summer--in Colorado. (This also wrecked my plans of going straight into college the fall after graduating high school, and I'm so glad it did!) As He is so faithful to do, God made it clear this was where He wanted me, and so the last few days of May 2010 found me saying a painful goodbye to the city I loved so dearly (and everyone in the city, including family and lifelong friends).

But God knew exactly what He was doing, even when I didn't have a clue. During my two semesters at Ellerslie, He did more in me than I could have ever anticipated or imagined. And when He sent me home to Memphis that December, I was ready to fight like never before for my city to know Christ. For I had learned how to fight--God had opened my eyes to what I had only just barely, once glimpsed before Ellerslie--how much of a battle ground prayer is, and how able our God is of working mightily through lives surrendered to His will. I still had no clear direction in regards to the inner city, but my prayers for Memphis had become more fervent, and I was more confident that they were not in vain--that God fully intends to redeem my city for His Kingdom.

A few months later, He provided me a job where I was paid to love on kiddos three days a week, and through that trained me in relying on His strength when my own was spent, relying on Him alone to give me grace to press on beyond my own abilities and be fully poured out for the children I worked with. There were so many times while I worked there that I knew I was worn out and needed to take a break and stop playing, but also knew that my calling right then was to stay engaged, to keep playing with and loving on these kids. And in those times of weakness, as I mentally cried out to God, "It has to be your strength, because I don't have any," again and again I saw Him come through. (Yes, this has something to do with where I'm going--trust me.)

One morning as I was listening to music on the way to work. My mp3 player was on shuffle, and a Lecrae song called "Beautiful Feet" came on. The song tells the stories of two men who grew up in the hood and ended up getting saved and going back to their neighborhoods to preach the Gospel. I'm sure I had heard this song before, but it hadn't hit home until that morning as I listened to the challenge Lecrae presents through it, calling on those whom God has called to the 'Hood to go there with the good news. He addresses those of us who haven't necessarily grown up in that environment, but who are called to go there and be His beautiful feet by bringing the Gospel. That morning, one line from this song leapt out at me and gripped me. I'm not sure if I'd ever caught it before, but if I had it hadn't sunk in that it was addressed to me. The line was this: "But who would minister in the sinister part of town? I pray if Jesus is calling you, you would be found." It cut me to the heart. In that moment, God whispered to my soul something to the effect of, "I have called you, and you know it. Will you answer the call?"

I didn't know what specifically He was asking of me, but I knew I needed to surrender again to His plans and His timing, even when I had no idea what they would look like. What I did have some clarity on was that He was asking me to be open to whatever timing God would present, and that I couldn't box it off in my mind that there was no way I could do anything in inner-city Memphis until I was out of college, etc. The other thing I felt Him clearly asking of me was to talk with my parents and share this with them, to ask them ahead of time to let me go wherever God led me, whenever He presented the opportunity. Mom and Dad already knew my heart for Memphis and the sense of calling I had for my city, but I felt that God needed to prepare them to be willing to let me risk potential danger for the sake of following our King. And He did prepare them for that; He used our conversations to make all three of us willing to allow God to lead me wherever and whenever He would into the heart of Memphis.

One Saturday evening not too long after that (this was in summer 2011), I had some time on my hands and felt the need to just spend time with God. I took my guitar with me to a nearby park and spent some time in worship and then in prayer, and when the sun started to set I packed up and headed to Starbucks, where I planned to find a nice little nook and sit with my Bible and a journal and soak up some more time alone with Jesus. On the way, I spontaneously changed my mind about which location I was going to, because I realized there was one closer that would probably be less populated on a night like this (this was pure conjecture, because I can probably count on one hand the number of times I've been to any Starbucks in the Memphis area).

As I pulled into the parking lot of this coffee shop that had not been in my original agenda, I thought things were still going basically according to plan. And they were, it just wasn't my plan! As I got in line behind two college-age girls, my sparkling raspberry soda in hand (yes, I knew I was in a coffee joint), I overheard them talking to the cashier. Some comment had made it obvious they didn't live in Memphis, so he asked what brought them here. When one of them replied that they were summer missionaries with a ministry in inner-city Memphis, my pulse quickened and my ears perked up. I paid for my soda, and then did something completely uncharacteristic for me: I walked up to complete strangers and introduced myself. Not only that, I explained that I had heard their conversation with the cashier and if they had a minute to tell me more about this ministry they were working with.

As it turned out, they were there with a whole group of summer missionaries and staff from Street Reach, which at that time I had never even heard of. Not only was the whole team there, but the director, Jason Cox, was there too. I was introduced to the rest of the group, and I explained to them basically what I've just been laying out here (though I gave them a shorter version)--how God has been giving me a passion for Memphis, specifically the inner city. And they told me about more of what they do.

Street Reach is a ministry based at Brinkley Heights Baptist Church--in inner-city Memphis! It started as the result of this small, impoverished church body, who about twenty years ago began praying that, if God would send the resources and reinforcements, they would work to take back their community for the Kingdom of God. Street Reach is what has come out of that prayer. While active in the community year-round, Street Reach runs Backyard Bible Clubs throughout the summer each year, with youth groups and college students coming in one-week shifts throughout to help facilitate these and also serve the community in other ways like nursing home visits, maintenance, lawn mowing, etcetera.

As you can probably imagine (especially if you know me very well), as I listened to all this I was getting more and more excited. I could already see that it had not been coincidence that I ran into these people or heard about this, and while I didn't know yet what might come of it, I knew God was up to something here. Before I left, Jason Cox (the director) gave me his card and told me to feel free to email him sometime if I ever wanted to drop by and see what they did first-hand, or if I was interested in being a part of Street Reach in the future.

I went home enthusiastic and ready to dive headfirst through this door God was clearly opening before me, but as it turned out, He was only showing me a glimpse; it wasn't time yet. I emailed Jason a few weeks later and asked about being able to come volunteer and help out, but I never heard back from him. For a while, this was puzzling to me, but God knew exactly what He was doing. He had other things lined up.

So last fall found me headed to college in Mississippi, once again saying an agonizing goodbye to my city for a season, and unsure of when God would ever open the door for me to go work in Memphis' inner city. But as I said, He had a plan (as always!). About a month later, my sister and I found the church in Jackson (Wesley Chapel) that was to become our home while we're at college. The youth group there, which we also got involved working with, is largely inner-city kids, plus some homeschoolers (it makes for an awesome combination, believe me--love our youth!!). Also at college, I've gotten involved with apartment ministries through the BSU (Baptist Student Union), and this semester my English class has been doing service-learning by helping tutor kids at a nearby apartment complex. Through all of these, and through college life in general, God has not only provided more experience working with kids from different backgrounds, but He has also been training me in how to be more fully poured out and to rely upon Him to lead me and give me words to speak when I tell them about Him, among other things. (Ever notice it's kind of hard to summarize everything God is working in your life?)

Ready? Here's where things start getting really exciting. On January 20, 2012, I received an email from Jason, the director of Street Reach, saying that they had some senior-staff positions open for this summer. He attached the application for it in case I was interested. I was stunned at first, for multiple reasons. One, I had never heard back from him when I'd emailed before, and I thought they had probably forgotten about ever meeting me--but he specifically mentioned that in the email. Two, I had assumed I was going back to my old job (childcare) for the summer, and that that was where God wanted me; now here was an opportunity to instead spend my summer in the very part of town He had been burdening me for for so long. I was a bit overwhelmed, to say the least.

Not wanting to repeat history and jump the gun on this, I spent a lot of time praying before I responded. I did email back with a few questions, and in that way found out that it would be a full-time commitment from the end of May all the way to the end of July, and then that it was actually a paying position, which I had not expected. In fact, as I had been praying before I found that out, I was asking God to be clear with me because I knew He could provide for me if He wanted me to do this instead of working elsewhere to earn money towards college. One by one, the doors started to swing open...from my parents being not only okay with, but excited about the opportunity...to God giving me the go-ahead to start on the application...to one of my employers at my old job being so enthusiastic that she was not only willing to not have me work there for the sake of this, but was also willing to provide a reference for me for the Street Reach application...to confirmations on nearly every side... In a lot of ways, what God has done these past few months is simply too awesome to put into words.

(This is the part where everything starts to tie together.) During Spring Break, I went in for my interview for the position at Street Reach. It was one of the most amazing, worshipful experiences of my life! It was then, as they explained in greater detail what this summer will look like and asked me questions, I suddenly became aware of so many of God's fingerprints in setting all of this up. It was then that I saw all the ways He has prepared me, from my family background and upbringing, to the youth group I grew up in, to the church we're at now in Memphis, to various experiences through the years, to Ellerslie and all that happened there, to the church and youth group my sister and I are plugged into in Jackson, to apartment ministries and tutoring here in Mississippi...everything God has been building in me for just about my entire life, He is going to utilize--and deepen--this summer as I work with Street Reach (yes, I got the job!).

After years and years of being readied for this, without knowing it, at long last I am heading into the place God has been laying on my heart for years. It's humbling to see this coming to pass and to realize the depth of the calling I have been given--to be fully spent and poured out in service to my King by serving in the heart of my city and fighting alongside Him to rescue those that most would overlook.

I know God has great plans for this city, this nation, this world, and this generation. He's called us to be a part of that, but it starts in the here and now. Memphis will not change unless the hearts of the people in this city change. America will not be changed unless the people in it surrender themselves to the Lord and allow Him to change them. This world and this generation will see no lasting good, until the individuals who make up this world and our generation call upon the only One who is good. Humans have tried for centuries to solve the world's problems. We've spent lifetimes of hours and millions of dollars in research, programs, methodologies, and so on, trying to make the world a better place, and all the while it has only gotten worse. The problem lies at the heart: sinful human nature. And there is only one Cure: the Gospel of Jesus Christ, who through His life, death, and resurrection defeated the powers of sin and death and purchased not only redemption and forgiveness, but also our inheritance: the Holy Spirit (see Ephesians 1). It is only by the power of Christ in us that we can live for Him and be His hands and His feet to this dying world.

It is only through Him that I can have any true or lasting effect on my city. But where He calls, He equips. He may be sending this girl who has thus far lived a pretty sheltered life, largely in the suburbs, to live in a neighborhood with a completely different culture than what I've grown up in, but His plans don't look like the ones we humans would come up with. I am indescribably excited to embark on this new assignment just over a month from now, and to see all that God does then, in the meantime, and after. I have a feeling this will not be my only opportunity to serve and fight on the front lines for my city.

But God's Kingdom is advanced through prayer. I have already put years of prayer into this, but that doesn't end now that the opportunity is here. If anything, it must increase. Will you join me in praying for our great God to have His way--now, this summer, and beyond--in Memphis, in your city, in our nations, in this world, and in our generation? Rise up, men and women of the Lord Most High, and fight like never before for our King and His glory! Rak Khazak!!

"And I will be known in the eyes of many nations, 

and they shall know that I am the LORD."

-Ezekiel 38:23b

Burnout?

There are many things (probably more than I could think of to list) that I have been taught and nurtured in growing up in regards to the Christian life. But there are also a few things that were either taught or just generally accepted, which at some point I began to realize have no biblical basis, or else have just been a little twisted by our Americanized-Christian culture. I will say that these are few and far between when it comes to the instruction I received growing up, but recently one in particular has been coming up that I just feel the need to go ahead and say something about. Burnout.
This is the idea that, as Christians, we need to be careful to not do too much, because if we do we end up with too much on our plate, we'll fizzle out and wind up with no energy, no strength, nothing to offer. It makes sense, if you think about it logically. Overexert, and you wind up useless and weaker than you started.

But there's a problem with this line of thinking. As Christians, we are called to not lean on our own strength, our own ability, but to fully and only rely on Jesus Christ. His strength is made perfectly evident in our weakness, because He's the strong one--not us. Our God is not weak or incapable.

Have you not known? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; His understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might He increases strength. Even youths shall faint and grow weary, and young men shall utterly fall exhausted; but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. -Isaiah 40:28-31

 This is one of those feel-good passages so many of us have heard so many times, even memorized for Bible class or Sunday school. But sometimes with verses like these, we allow them to lose their potency for us because we don't really listen to what they're saying, they're so familiar to us. So go back and read it again, really read it--listen to what it's saying.

Do you see it? It's teaching the same thing the New Testament does: that our strength must come from God, or we won't have any worth mentioning. The "burnout" principle has some truth to it. If we set out in our own strength to do what we think God's called us to, in our power, we will wind up miserable failures at it all. There won't be fruit, and instead the life will be sucked out of us who are trying, in our own strength, to do something good for God. That's the problem. First, it has to really be what He's called you to. God doesn't just give us strength and say, "Now go find a way to use it!" He has a purposeful, specific plan for each of us in advancing His Kingdom. Not all are called to be overseas missionaries. Not all are called to be teachers or pastors or even parents. But each one of us has a unique calling, and when God calls, He equips. It is only by His strength that we can accomplish His work; that's why the Gospel's so important. God Himself has done what we could not do, and through His death has given us Life--a.k.a. Himself. "I am the way, the truth and the life..." ring any bells?
God didn't give us a job, sit back, and say, "Good luck with that." He filled us with the only thing that can accomplish His will--Him. He is the everlasting God. He doesn't faint or grow weary; we do. He never fails; we do.

So now we come to the side of burnout that's not biblically sound: the idea that we can be doing "too much" for God. It's true that when we do life on our own terms and in our own strength, we will run out of energy, motivation, and ability to carry it all out. But it's not true that when we are doing what we were created for and relying on Christ to do what we can't on our own, we will meet with burnout. Study the New Testament. Who is Lord of the Sabbath? Who is to be our rest, our strength, our savior, the Head of the Body, the foundation upon which everything rests? Jesus. As long as our gaze is on Him, He will equip us for every good work that He has for us to do.

Do we ever see Paul decide he's done enough and he can take it easy now? On the contrary, he gets stoned and dragged out to the trash heap, then revives and gets right back up and strolls straight back into town to keep preaching. In addition to preaching and ministering everywhere he goes, he makes tents and sells them for a living, finds time to write to the churches in other cities, and never ceases praying for the believers everywhere. Sounds like a pretty good description of work that, if done day in and day out over the course of years, is a recipe for wearing you out quickly.

So what?

Have we been promised a life of ease and comfort, to do the minimal amount of work, stamp God's name on it, and say we've made our contribution and can hang out at the status quo? I don't think I've ever read a single verse in the entire Bible that even hints at that. If there are any, feel free to point them out to me. But I'm pretty sure we were promised trials, persecution, hardship, and slander, and for our flesh, a daily, bloody death on a cross. Crosses aren't comfortable. And Jesus hadn't died on one yet when He commanded us to daily take up our cross and follow Him. But He has died, and He has risen. And He has called us to follow Him, to preach His Gospel to the ends of the earth, to make disciples, to glorify Him in all things. He's called us to a life we can't live without Him.

We do not go alone into this world, bearing the good news. We go filled with and clothed in Him (check out Ephesians). The hope of glory is Christ in you. So should we settle for anything less? Should we keep trying to do things our own way, in our own strength, when we've been given the opportunity of a lifetime to be spent and poured out for the glory of our King?

"The hour of God is struck! War is at hand! In God's holy name, let us arise and build! The God of heaven, He will fight for us, and we for Him. We will not build on the sand but on the bedrock of the sayings of Christ. And the gates and minions of hell shall not prevail against us. Should such men as we fear? Before the whole world, aye, before the sleepy, lukewarm, faithless, namby-pamby world, we will venture our all for Him, we will live and we will die for Him, and we will do it with His joy unspeakable singing aloud in our hearts. We will a thousand times sooner die trusting in our God than live trusting in man. And when we come to this position, the battle is already won, and the end of the glorious campaign in sight."  -C.T. Studd

Let Us Run.

Don't you love it when God takes something you feel like you've already known (at least with your head), and reveals it on an even deeper level? I do. That ecstatic feeling of having just plunged into greater depths of knowing Him? Yeah, that's what I've been feeling lately.
And you know what? I've realized it has nothing to do with circumstance. It's not like there was something that happened recently that caused any of this; it was just God.
The other night, and I don't think I even fully know how it happened or how on earth to describe it, but all the sudden I was so overwhelmed by the presence of my King, so humbled and awed, so filled to bursting with joy and gratitude, that just about all I could do was smile up at Him and laugh, for there were no words. I know I probably looked like an absolute lunatic if anyone saw me outside pacing (and possibly dancing) in the parking lot. But even that thought was not enough to make me want to "tone it down" even a little. If anything, it made me smile even more! Call me crazy, but I love my God!!
Like I said, there was no particular circumstance that led to this time of joyous worship and deep communion with my King. If anything, current circumstances would seem like they should have the opposite effect. Between burdens for several people I know or know of who do not know Jesus and are in not-so-good situations, the pressure of some decisions I'm facing, and the usual stresses of schoolwork, you'd seriously think I'd be stealing away with God simply to get away from it all, or that I'd be so overwhelmed with all that that I wouldn't be able to focus on anything else. But here's the thing: by the grace of God (for it's certainly not something I have any ability in on my own!), I trust Him. Again and again He's proven Himself faithful, again and again He's caused my faith to be challenged and then strengthened and then put to greater tests...and the result is that I am now more certain than ever before that He is in control and He will work all things together according to His perfect will.
What I've been experiencing lately is the Author and Source of joy dwelling within me and pouring that joy into me like never before. I can't contain it!
So that's why I'm up at midnight even though I have class at 8:00 tomorrow. Because my God is so great that even when I am completely overwhelmed and blown away by the depth and beauty of His joy (which, I may point out, is only one of His attributes)--it's still only a tiny droplet in the limitless ocean of the fullness of His joy!

"Draw me after You; let us run.
The King has brought me into His chambers."
-Song of Songs 1:4a

Why Am I Here?

Lately I've been realizing more and more how atypical I am, how ironic my life right now really is. I'm not your typical college student. I didn't come to college to get a high-paying job, to afford a nice house and a fancy car, to have a husband, 1.3 kids, and a dog. I'm not here to find a man. I'm not here to prove myself, academically or otherwise. I'm not here to get away from home and my family. It seems like I'm not here for any of the possible reasons most people go to college. So why am I here?

Honestly, that's something I questioned a lot, particularly during my first month or so here at MC. If you don't believe me, ask the people back home who, when I came home one weekend for a visit a few weeks into school, asked how college was and all I could say was an emphatic, "It's good to be home!" I had to wrestle through this question, because from the start I haven't been here for any of the reasons I just listed. During those first few weeks, I repeatedly found myself asking God, "Am I really supposed to be here? Can I please drop out?" A large part of what made me want to be anywhere but here is just how grieved I was to see the spiritual state of things. I'm at a university that calls itself Christian, but with all the distractions, the complacency, the subtle lies that seem to surround and permeate this campus on so many levels, at first especially it was hard for me to see any signs of life or hope. 

God's been clear with me all along that this is where He's called me. And so with that for me to cling to, He has shown me step by step that there is nothing too daunting for Him, that He is greater and stronger than everything that tries to pull the people on this campus away from Him. Through reminding me of who He is and what He wills to do, God has given me joy and faith and the grace to persevere here. 

So you might be wondering at this point why I am here. Well, in some ways I have answers to that, and in some ways I don't. Ultimately, I'm here for God's glory. Whether that means being here to be a real friend to some of the people He's put me in contact with and to live out my faith before them, or to seize hidden opportunities to serve and bless people even if they'll never know who did it, or to give a much-needed hug to one of the cleaning staff...I cannot imagine or list all the ways God can possibly use me, even in the little things, here. 

But why am I at college, earning a degree? Well, here's where you're about to see just how atypical a college student I am. =)

I'm at college to hone some skills and to earn a degree which will hopefully help me get a job editing (though I may easily wind up working for minimum wage at a gym or a fast-food chain instead), to make end's meat and go live in the "hood," to take the Gospel to those who need it and know they need it and to live among them daily as a witness of God's grace, to take on the principalities and spiritual powers that have claimed their turf in the heart of my city, and to watch my God fight for us and prove to everyone Who is the Lord Most High. I fully expect to die with a bullet in my head one day, or something similar. And, call me crazy, but what better way to go than to die standing and fighting for my God to be known by those whom Satan will fight tooth-and-nail to see destroyed?

So that's why I'm here, and it all starts now. On my own, I am completely incapable of any of this. But greater is He who is in me than he that is in this world, and I will live and die to prove that. 

Daily, may I live and die to prove that. Daily, may I lay down my rights, my desires, my way, and watch You fill me with the fullness of all You are, King Jesus. You are the Way. You are the Truth. You are the Life. You are Love. You are Lord of all, so be Lord of all I am. Have Your way.

Worthless Without You

This afternoon I stumbled across half a sheet of paper on which a little over a month ago I had written a song...well, the lyrics anyway. I figured out some chords to it today, but thought I'd share the lyrics. It's a song about probably the main thing God's been revealing to me during my time at college thus far. The recurring theme has been this: "Apart from Me, you can do nothing." I'm pretty sure Jesus meant that. =) It's so true, unless we are abiding in Him, seeking Him, being led by Him, anything we try in our own strength to work up or to do, comes to nothing. We can't do anything worthwhile, but He can. May we be overtaken by Him more and more, be used of Him to advance His Kingdom and do His work...for without Him, without Him abiding in us and we in Him, we can do nothing.

Worthless without You

  I was busy dying, embracing everything that would kill me,

  Running from and fighting the only One who could save me.

  I was trapped inside my darkness, imprisoned by my own sin,

  Until You rescued me.

Now I'm busy living, running after the Source of all things good.

I'm caught up living for You, dying to me, to see You move.

I've forsaken all I once lived for, all I ever knew.

For You are worth far more.

  You rescued, You redeemed, You gave worth to this life.

  I was not worth the price You paid, 

  But You are worthy of my life, bought by Your blood.

  Apart from You, I can do nothing.

  So have Your way. Be Lord of all.

Now I'm busy living, running after the Source of all things good.
I'm caught up living for You, dying to me, to see You move.
I've forsaken all I once lived for, all I ever knew.
For You are worth far more.

     Apart from You, I can do nothing.
     I must "Do or do not. There is no try."
     Unless You build the house, my labor will be in vain.
     It must be You; it can't be me.
     For anything I do in my own strength is only filthy rags.
     I'm worthless without You.

Now I'm busy living, running after the Source of all things good.
I'm caught up living for You, dying to me, to see You move.
I've forsaken all I once lived for, all I ever knew.
For You are worth far more.

 Jesus, You are worth far more...

Two Things That Can't Be Separated

Here's a question for you:
How important is it for Christian musicians and worship leaders to have sound doctrine?
After all, their specialty and gifting is in music and singing, right?

Here's another question:
Is that the way it should be?

I've grown up in a generation that (whether people--even leaders--have ever come right out and said this or not) has tried to separate doctrine from worship. As listeners, church members, and customers, we (myself included) have not required of our musicians an understanding of even basic doctrine. Just because a band or an artist claims to be Christian, we'll support them. As I said, I cannot separate myself from this. For years of my life, though I was not always convinced certain bands were Christian just because they said so, I listened to "Christian" music that I have since realized has bad doctrine or even none at all behind it.
But today I'm here to tell you that sound doctrine is absolutely vital to true worship. What is worship? Adoration and praise of our glorious God, right? Can we really be motivated to worship--truly worship (see John 4:24)--without having a correct view of Who God is?
And on the flip-side, what is doctrine without worship? I'd question whether it is truly possible to have one without the other. When you see God as He is, when you behold the Truth, how can you help but be moved to heartfelt worship? He is far too majestic and awesome for us to fully comprehend in the first place, but even just a glimpse of His glory is enough to send the beholders straight to our knees and faces in wonder. Our praise must be based on Truth, or else it is groundless and just a fake stirring of emotion.

You cannot have true worship without true doctrine.

And when you really understand true doctrine, it must (and will) invariably drive you to worship.

So here's my challenge to the worship leader, the songwriter, the musician--get your doctrine straight; your job is (and should be) to point people to Jesus. And what better way to do that than to know Him more, to know the truth about Him, to behold Him as He truly is... And when you see Him in His glory, it becomes that much easier to draw others' gazes to Him as well. That's where worship begins--knowing and beholding God almighty.
May we as believers in the one true God behold and sing and testify of the greatness of our God. Every knee will bow, and every tongue confess that Jesus is Lord...for us, may it be today. May we focus on the Glorious One and forget our selves in His presence. May we dwell and walk with Him, learning more about Him and simultaneously worshiping Him for all He is.
This is what we were made for.

Shall We Start with a Song?

Well, I'm going to begin posting soon (finally!) about my findings in studying the words translated "praise" and "worship" throughout the Bible. And to start things off, well, how's about a song?

This is a song I wrote a little over a year ago, and it seemed like a fairly fitting way to begin a study of praise and worship. This song was birthed out of a time of mingled worship and conviction. One day during the summer semester of Ellerslie in 2010, Eric Ludy read worshipfully through a list he had compiled of the Names of God. As I sat there reading along with the others, my heart was drawn to deeper adoration than perhaps ever before, but at the same time I was convicted thinking of the way that all of creation and nature has continued to declare the glory of God, while so often His people--who were created to sing His praise even louder--fail to give Him the glory due His Name. During that time of worship, the cry of my heart became for my King to gain the glory He deserves in and through His people's lives, starting with mine.

To Sing Glory

For too long, we have let nature sing louder than us

Of Your power and Your wisdom, Your majesty and Your praise.

Now it's time for Your Bride to rise and take her place

And sing the song You deserve to tell of Your matchless grace.

     We were created to sing glory.

     We were made to adore You, to sing glory.

     Glory...Glory...Glory.

We will sing of Your glory, Your power in the earth.

We'll proclaim all Your gospel. We'll sing 'til all have heard.

We will stand on Your Truth and the promise of Your Word.

We won't wait any longer to sing of Your matchless worth.

     We were created to sing glory.

     We were made to adore You, to sing glory.

     Glory...Glory...Glory.

  We were created to sing glory.

  We were made for this, our purpose--to glorify our King.

  May our lives live up to their true purpose,

  Not with words alone to sing Your glory.

     We were created to sing glory.

     We were made to adore You, to sing glory.

     Glory...Glory...Glory...