Ache

Late at night--or is it early morning?--
My head on the pillow, I hear You whisper,
Asking me to forsake sleep, to die to myself,
Come away with You, and share Your heart.

"Will you ache with Me in the watches of the night?
Will you watch with Me for the dark to break to light?
Will you weep for what I'm weeping for,
Reach for those I'm reaching for--
Will you bear My heart tonight?"

I know it's not because You need me.
What's even better is the way You call me,
Inviting me to join You in Your mission for this world,
To walk with You and bear Your heart.

I yearn to ache with You in the watches of the night.
I want to watch with You 'til the darkness breaks to light.
I long to weep for what You're weeping for,
Reach for those You're reaching for--
Let me bear Your heart tonight.

   So I'll walk with You in the watches of the night.
   In the darkest times and seasons, I will look to Your Light.
   Help me welcome inconvenience and trust You with the rest,
   For there's joy that lurks in suffering,
   There is peace within this aching pain,
   When I care for what You care about,
   When I yield to be, myself, poured out
   By following my King.

I will ache with You in the watches of the night.
I will watch with You as the darkness breaks to light.
I will weep for what You're weeping for,
Reach for those You're reaching for--
Help me bear Your heart tonight.

Burnout?

There are many things (probably more than I could think of to list) that I have been taught and nurtured in growing up in regards to the Christian life. But there are also a few things that were either taught or just generally accepted, which at some point I began to realize have no biblical basis, or else have just been a little twisted by our Americanized-Christian culture. I will say that these are few and far between when it comes to the instruction I received growing up, but recently one in particular has been coming up that I just feel the need to go ahead and say something about. Burnout.
This is the idea that, as Christians, we need to be careful to not do too much, because if we do we end up with too much on our plate, we'll fizzle out and wind up with no energy, no strength, nothing to offer. It makes sense, if you think about it logically. Overexert, and you wind up useless and weaker than you started.

But there's a problem with this line of thinking. As Christians, we are called to not lean on our own strength, our own ability, but to fully and only rely on Jesus Christ. His strength is made perfectly evident in our weakness, because He's the strong one--not us. Our God is not weak or incapable.

Have you not known? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; His understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might He increases strength. Even youths shall faint and grow weary, and young men shall utterly fall exhausted; but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. -Isaiah 40:28-31

 This is one of those feel-good passages so many of us have heard so many times, even memorized for Bible class or Sunday school. But sometimes with verses like these, we allow them to lose their potency for us because we don't really listen to what they're saying, they're so familiar to us. So go back and read it again, really read it--listen to what it's saying.

Do you see it? It's teaching the same thing the New Testament does: that our strength must come from God, or we won't have any worth mentioning. The "burnout" principle has some truth to it. If we set out in our own strength to do what we think God's called us to, in our power, we will wind up miserable failures at it all. There won't be fruit, and instead the life will be sucked out of us who are trying, in our own strength, to do something good for God. That's the problem. First, it has to really be what He's called you to. God doesn't just give us strength and say, "Now go find a way to use it!" He has a purposeful, specific plan for each of us in advancing His Kingdom. Not all are called to be overseas missionaries. Not all are called to be teachers or pastors or even parents. But each one of us has a unique calling, and when God calls, He equips. It is only by His strength that we can accomplish His work; that's why the Gospel's so important. God Himself has done what we could not do, and through His death has given us Life--a.k.a. Himself. "I am the way, the truth and the life..." ring any bells?
God didn't give us a job, sit back, and say, "Good luck with that." He filled us with the only thing that can accomplish His will--Him. He is the everlasting God. He doesn't faint or grow weary; we do. He never fails; we do.

So now we come to the side of burnout that's not biblically sound: the idea that we can be doing "too much" for God. It's true that when we do life on our own terms and in our own strength, we will run out of energy, motivation, and ability to carry it all out. But it's not true that when we are doing what we were created for and relying on Christ to do what we can't on our own, we will meet with burnout. Study the New Testament. Who is Lord of the Sabbath? Who is to be our rest, our strength, our savior, the Head of the Body, the foundation upon which everything rests? Jesus. As long as our gaze is on Him, He will equip us for every good work that He has for us to do.

Do we ever see Paul decide he's done enough and he can take it easy now? On the contrary, he gets stoned and dragged out to the trash heap, then revives and gets right back up and strolls straight back into town to keep preaching. In addition to preaching and ministering everywhere he goes, he makes tents and sells them for a living, finds time to write to the churches in other cities, and never ceases praying for the believers everywhere. Sounds like a pretty good description of work that, if done day in and day out over the course of years, is a recipe for wearing you out quickly.

So what?

Have we been promised a life of ease and comfort, to do the minimal amount of work, stamp God's name on it, and say we've made our contribution and can hang out at the status quo? I don't think I've ever read a single verse in the entire Bible that even hints at that. If there are any, feel free to point them out to me. But I'm pretty sure we were promised trials, persecution, hardship, and slander, and for our flesh, a daily, bloody death on a cross. Crosses aren't comfortable. And Jesus hadn't died on one yet when He commanded us to daily take up our cross and follow Him. But He has died, and He has risen. And He has called us to follow Him, to preach His Gospel to the ends of the earth, to make disciples, to glorify Him in all things. He's called us to a life we can't live without Him.

We do not go alone into this world, bearing the good news. We go filled with and clothed in Him (check out Ephesians). The hope of glory is Christ in you. So should we settle for anything less? Should we keep trying to do things our own way, in our own strength, when we've been given the opportunity of a lifetime to be spent and poured out for the glory of our King?

"The hour of God is struck! War is at hand! In God's holy name, let us arise and build! The God of heaven, He will fight for us, and we for Him. We will not build on the sand but on the bedrock of the sayings of Christ. And the gates and minions of hell shall not prevail against us. Should such men as we fear? Before the whole world, aye, before the sleepy, lukewarm, faithless, namby-pamby world, we will venture our all for Him, we will live and we will die for Him, and we will do it with His joy unspeakable singing aloud in our hearts. We will a thousand times sooner die trusting in our God than live trusting in man. And when we come to this position, the battle is already won, and the end of the glorious campaign in sight."  -C.T. Studd

A Black-and-White Issue

What I am about to write is possibly one of the boldest and most politically incorrect things I've ever taken a public stance on. But that can't stop me from writing it. A conviction and righteous indignation that has been stirring within me for years, well over half my nineteen-year-old life, has finally risen to the surface so strongly that I simply can't keep my mouth shut or my fingers from typing. If I try, I'll explode; it's no use. So, here goes.

On my wall is a poster I made, which holds a whole list of things I am praying about for my city. It's nothing fancy. The top reads "Fighting for Memphis" and below that the lists are separated into two columns: "Fighting For..." and "Fighting Against." It's not a comprehensive list, either. I've run out of room on my single sheet of poster board, and one of these days I'll get another one to go beneath to continue the list. But the very first topic on the right-hand column (things I'm fighting against), is racism.

Yep, I said it. Racism.

I've lived in Memphis all my life, with the exception of the six months I was at Ellerslie in Colorado. Hence, I've grown up in the heart of the Mid-South. And I can tell you, racism is very much alive today, and has been all my life and even before. Anyone who's lived here in Memphis knows it, even if they wouldn't admit it. And I'm willing to bet, based both on conversations I've had with friends who've grown up even up North, and on my knowledge of human nature and the lies that have been passed down for so long, that it's alive and well in other places too.
Before I go any further, there is something I need to say. I am living proof that someone can grow up in an area where racism is as prevalent as it is in Memphis, and not be racist themselves. I'm not trying to sound arrogant or prideful, but it's true. I've heard people say things like "You can't convince me that when you look at me you don't notice I'm black." Well, to a level, that's true, but let me tell you something. When I meet someone for the first time, of course I notice what color their skin is. Just like I notice what color their hair and eyes are. And in the same way that I don't, when I meet someone with red hair, immediately imagine some boundary between us because "My hair's brown and hers is red--what if we can't relate to eachother?" Do you see how ridiculous that sounds? Same goes for blondes--some of the brightest, smartest people I know are blonde (so cut the jokes). And same goes for Asians--one of my closest friends in the world is Asian. And the same goes for African Americans. My youngest brother is black, and so is my "big bro" (family friend whom we've sort of adopted, but not legally or anything).

Let's get something straight here. There is one race that exists, and only one that has ever existed--the human race. It doesn't matter what color anyone's hair or eyes or skin tone are; we all came from Adam and Eve. Racism. Break it down, and the word literally means a belief in the existence of races. And this idea that has so penetrated and plagued our prideful, sinful, self-righteous minds for hundreds of years--this idea that there is more than one race--is a lie straight from Hell. If you don't believe me, look at its fruit. Ever seen racism produce good fruit? Love? Joy? Peace? Patience? Goodness? Kindness? I sure haven't. I've seen it cause strife, division, hatred, murder, deceit, and pride--and none of those are at all praiseworthy.
I am sick and tired of watching this lie eat away at my city and my fellow man. I've grown up and somehow escaped its poison, but in that I find myself in the minority. And that's sad. What's even more sad is that this lie is so prevalent in the Church. Know that I'm not throwing a general slur out there and saying that every church body is controlled by racism. But at the same time I know we're not free of it completely in the American church. And that has to change. I'm not holding you to my opinion, but to the Word of God:

"...ye have put off the old man with his deeds; and have put on the new man, which is renewed in knowledge after the image of Him that created him: wherein there is neither Greek nor Jew, circumcision nor uncircumcision, Barbarian, Scythian, bond, nor free: but Christ is all, and in all." -Colossians 3:9-11

By all means, let us throw off the bonds that hinder us, stare down the lies that try to destroy from the inside out, and confront those lies with the Truth.

Before I was born, but not so long ago in our nation's history, there was a great movement that took place and fought for human rights and equality. We know it as the Civil Rights Movement. But I'm here to tell you, while that movement was largely victorious, it was only going after a symptom, and not the root of the real issue. The issue is not discrimination, it is not "racism" in the sense of treating people differently because of the color of their skin or because of their upbringing. The issue lies within our own hearts, in our idiotic pride that would dare say, "I am more important or more special or of more worth than someone else because of _____." And here I must plead guilty, for I cannot pretend that I have never acted out the lie that I and my own interests and "rights" are greater or more important than those of anyone else. I have. I have selfishly looked out for my own interests and not the interests of others. I have treated others--even and perhaps especially my own parents and family members--like they were less important than me. The lie we are so prone to believe deep down, that it's all about me and the world all revolves around me, stems from the exact same place that the lie of racism does. And it's sin. There is no other name for it, for it goes directly against what God has mandated.

So, America, let's repent of our sin. Let's confess before the God Who already knows, and ask Him by His grace to change our hearts and make them like His. This is something only He can do. No matter how many movements we have, Jesus is the only One who can change our hearts. I've grown up free, by the grace of God, from racism, shielded in part by my parents' solid belief in the Bible and their lack of racism. But I know my God, and I know there is no sin too great for Him to overcome. You want victory? Side with Him, and trust Him for it. He's able, and He's faithful.

I don't know how many people will read this. And to a large extent, I don't care. That's in God's hands, and if He wants to have just a few people read it and be stirred, whether to repentance or to prayer, or both--it's fine with me. And though my flesh shrinks from the idea of a huge number of people (especially people who don't know me) reading all this, my spirit is altogether willing to allow that to be the case, if God so chooses.

That is all.

The Adventure

There's a truth that's gradually come to my attention within the past year or so, which lately has also become a challenge to my soul:

Life is supposed to be an adventure. 

It explains a lot. It explains why we as humans are so drawn to adventure, whether it be in a fictional story in a book or a movie, or the more real-life adventures like camping, hiking, and such. But perhaps before I go too far down the road of what this means, I should backtrack and give some evidence that this is truth and not just my own opinion.
First, how about a definition of "eternal life"? After all, that is what we as Christians are promised, correct? I know in our day and age "eternal life" is seen to mean simply that when we die, we will go to live forever in heaven. Well, guess how Jesus defined it?

"And this is life eternal, that they might know Thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, Whom Thou has sent."        -John 17:3

That's right, eternal life is knowing God. I wonder if you're caught as stunned and simply awestruck as I was a few weeks ago when my sister brought that verse up in a conversation. I'm sure I had read it before, but quite certain it had never hit home until then. And get this, the Greek word translated there as "know" is actually pretty specific; it means intimately knowing someone in the way a husband and wife know each other. Jesus isn't talking about being simply acquainted with Him. See, He is eternal life.

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life: no man cometh unto the Father but by Me." -John 14:6

 Now, back to the adventure aspect. Let me ask you something, is a life of total abandon and surrender to a call to lay down everything (including our lives, for we are not our own [see 1 Corinthians 6:19-20])--does that sound like a dull, ordinary life? Sure doesn't to me. And look at the other side of this calling we have as Christians: we get to know Jesus Christ, and we get to be transformed by Him, into His likeness. And we're called to fight! I love the analogy in Ephesians 6 when Paul tells us to "put on the armor of God." Why would we wear armor, why would we have a sword, if we're not in the midst of a battle?

There's this myth that has been readily embraced by the majority of American churches and Christians these days. It goes like this: There are only a few select Christians in every generation that are called to step up and live out a radical Christianity that stands out, that accomplishes much for the Kingdom of God, that brings them ridicule and scorn; there are a few called-out ones in each generation who will step up and take the lead, and live a fully yielded and poured-out life for Jesus. I used to believe it, too. But guess what? I've got news for ya. Know how many times this idea is backed up by Scripture? ZERO.
When Jesus is saying "Whosoever will come after Me, let him deny himself, take up his cross, and follow me,"
do you see some little exemption clause anywhere in the surrounding text? Did He pause just then and say, "Well, those are the requirements for My followers who are to be the 'extreme' ones. But the rest of you..." Um, no.
Let's pause for just one second, too, and take a look at those requirements our King laid out for us:
Whosoever--anyone, whoever
will--The word implies an exertion of the will. This is no flippant decision.
come after--follow, pursue
Me--Jesus, the Messiah, Emmanuel (God with us), the King of all kings, the Lamb that was slain...
let him
deny--renounce completely 
himself--all you are, including your desires, your dreams, your talents...everything that defines you
take up--pick up, carry
his--your own
cross--an instrument of torture and death (sound fun?)
and--plus, in addition to
follow--pursue, keep company with, become disciple of, side with
Me--our King, our Master, our Life, our Leader, our Example-Setter, our Savior...


THIS is what we're called to. These are the requirements that Jesus Christ Himself set for all who would follow Him, who would be called by His Name. And last time I checked, we're not at all capable in our own strength and abilities to do any of this--which is where the adventure comes in. He didn't leave us with an impossible task and no means of carrying it out. We have His very Spirit dwelling inside us, transforming our minds by the power of His Word and changing our hearts as we come to intimately know Him, as we willingly offer ourselves to Him as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to Him.

See what I mean? ADVENTURE! The adventure of a lifetime awaits...

And that's exactly what has been challenging me lately with sweet conviction. I have tasted such adventure. I've walked these trails, or the beginnings of them. But there's deeper to go--so much deeper! Indeed, with an infinitely great God, there shall always be more of Him to know. So why do I sometimes catch myself sitting on the sidelines, watching my life drag by without this sense of adventure? The answer, though painful, is simple: the times that happens are the times I have taken my gaze off Christ. It happens when I choose to live for myself and to simply go through the motions instead of living moment-by-moment completely consumed by and caught up in the wonder of all He is and all He has in store. When I'm not getting my directions from Him, I tend to flounder. When I'm not pursuing Him and more of Him, I find myself and my life seeming strange and empty.
I don't know about you, but I for one love adventure. And the last thing I want is to live a boring, ordinary life when I'm called to more. So let's shake off the complacency that has settled in in our comfortable, safe Christianity, and chase the adventure God's set before us. Let's run this race with endurance, not staggering or fainting from fatigue, but leaning wholly upon His mighty strength in our weakness, so that we may truly run and not grow faint, but instead rise up on wings as eagles'. Let's press hard and stop settling for less than what God has in store--settling for less than eternal life, which is knowing Him. Onward!

"Have I not commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee withersoever thou goest."        -Joshua 1:9